Why you must marry well

- marriage is beautiful

Hello my friend,

How are you doing?

Last Thursday made it 4 years since I got married!

If you've been here a while, you know it's my custom to share a marriage-related newsletter every anniversary. This year, I want to talk about something deeply important: why you must take your time to choose the right partner.

A few years ago, my husband and I were with someone during her childbirth. Initially, everything was going smoothly, but things suddenly took a turn and became risky.

During that tense moment, I watched her husband shrink in fear. He kept saying how afraid and hopeless he felt. And to be honest, I was shocked and, at some point, angry.

All I could think was:
“What kind of man is this? Why are you confessing fear and hopelessness when you could be praying, speaking life, and declaring GOD’s word over your wife and baby?”

For both of my pregnancies, I was very intentional with my confessions—praying and declaring GOD’s word over myself and my baby. But there were countless times when my husband would lay his hands on me, praying and declaring perfect health and perfect delivery over me and our child. Sometimes, I would wake up and see his hands on my tummy, praying.

One reason things run smoothly in our home is the strength of my husband’s spirit.

Please, don’t marry a weak man or woman.
Marry someone who can hold you up—not just physically or financially—but spiritually.

Professionally speaking, my husband is my greatest cheerleader. There are times I’ve felt like giving up—when I’ve thought, “Gosh, I just can’t do this anymore.”
But he always talks through my “why”.

Behind every award, feature, or professional win, my husband is there—advising, supporting, coaching, and praying for me. I feel so safe and supported by him, and I have never had to feel like I should shrink for him to shine.

And this is not to say everything is perfect. We have high-pressure days—but even on those days, I still can’t imagine doing this marriage and parenting thing with anyone else. He gets me. And I am truly happy here.

Now think about it:
If someone who got it right with marriage still experiences high-pressure days…
What would it look like for someone who misses it completely?

If you are unmarried, please take your time. Be sure about your partner before you say “I do”. Be very, very sure.

The people pressuring you to marry quickly won’t be in the marriage with you.
After eating jollof rice and chicken at your wedding, they’ll go back to their lives and leave you with your decision. Only you will live with your decision—every single day.

So choose wisely. Make sure you're aligned in vision, values, and purpose.
Most importantly, let GOD lead you.

My life has become a million times better since I got married—because I got it right.
And you can too!

Don’t think about yourself alone. Think about your unborn children too.
Would you be happy if your kids turned out like this person you want to marry?
Would he or she be a great parent and role model to your kids?

This is a major factor too.

Marriage is so beautiful with the right person, but it is a living hell with the wrong person.

So please, take your time and get it right. That’s my simple anniversary message for this year.

I hope it helps.

I'll see you next time.
Till then, stay fabulous. 

With Love,
Aramide.